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I Wonder...

I Wonder Lord ...

Could what should be a passionate embrace of spirit, an enraptured eternal relationship born of loving gratitude and unbounded adoration ever fade to become something less?

If so Lord, where would the continuing exultation in our breathtaking salvation be found? Where could it go? Your promises and the triumphant shouts hailing your victories on behalf of mankind still echo across the unending expanse of the heavens. And yet I wonder, could the magnitude of your grace involved in our eternal deliverance ever be lost on us? I fear to wonder...

For by your mercy, time passed now no longer holds a measure of threatening justice against us and the freedom and life of eternity wrought by redemption will last far beyond the reach of these days. Is it possible for a mere life of days to overshadow the gift of a life of eternity? I wonder still...

Had we been only physical prisoners - convicts sentenced to death with our necks stretched out across the chopping block and the heavy ax poised to sever soft flesh and bone, would we not be forever grateful to the issuer of a last second pardon?  How much more to an innocent who traded the frail bone and the tender flesh of his neck for ours in our place?

I would hold back no tear for the suffering of the innocent and the anguish I caused. My heart would be forever fearfully torn by the kindness of one so undeserving my fate. Yet the grace I've received is so far more severe! For the one who was killed in my place is no less than the Holy Son of God Most High, so pure ... unlike me.

You stood with the power to overcome any accuser, but remained silently knowing as the only hope that I could be saved. My punishment that you knowingly sought and bore was far less quick than the blade and my heart is crushed for the flesh tearing beatings and the horror of your death on a cross whose further terrors to a man, also were mine.

But the One like no other, who bore the crushing shame of my sentence now lives to receive my unending adoration, having conquered death and stripped the assignment of damnation from my future. And all that I have is repentance for offering to repay you and the unending love of my heart enveloped in gratitude as a vessel to carry them.

Oh Lord, let not this burning in my chest be cooled, or the flame of my heart for my Lord ever be covered. Write your works of mercy on my heart deeply that I may never see beyond them. Let me not be a fool for this world, but one lost in the adoration of my rescuer only. Let my foundation ever be laid be at feet of my savior. In your kindness, make this my rest.

Let my heart and my life sing full volume, a melody of gratitude and love for my redeemer. One that your ears long to hear, only that I may see delight on your face. For your joy brings me joy and your heart's delight brings me pleasure. Oh, but I know that your joy is your people...

So while I yet live days, let your river of mercy flow through me and the fruits of your spirit overtake me to be found abundant. Let the countenance of my words and my deeds be the captivating reflection of my Lord ... that others too may be led to fearfully wonder.


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