Responsibility Mine...

The sudden impact both shocked and jolted me. I couldn't imagine in that instant what had just happened...

I was entering a parking lot with narrow isles - you know the kind. As I came in near dusk, I turned as sharply as I could into an open space, but immediately realized that it wasn't sharp enough. Realizing that I was at an angle in the space, I looked in both directions to make sure the coast was clear and put my pickup in reverse to straighten up in the space.

Just as I started to move another pickup moving quickly on my left, turned the corner to go behind me. I put on the brake and came to a quick stop to let him go by. After he passed, I again looked both ways and realized that another pickup was approaching from my right to pass right behind me. I pulled more forward to allow him more room to pass behind me and started looking again to see if the coast was clear. This time it was a pedestrian approaching again from my right. Being the courteous kind, I let him pass. I waited until he cleared and looked both ways again.

The spot I had chosen to enter was near an intersection in the parking lot and the pickup that had just passed was still waiting to turn, but was clear of my intended path. The coast was clear, so I was finally able to back out and correct myself in the space. And I began to slowly back out when...

By the manufacturer's design, my pickup is a four wheel drive that sits at a slight angle which leaves the tailgate high in the rear view mirror. But an array of sensors in the rear bumper are intended to warn the driver with a shrill alarm if ever there's an object in the path when the vehicle is in reverse. There was no alarm and a quick look in both directions had made it certain that the path was clear, so I slowly started to back out. However, the sickening crunch and the look of horror on a nearby pedestrians face in front of me when I came to a sudden stop, gave me plenty of reason to know that something had just gone horribly wrong.

As I stepped out of the truck, I could begin to see behind me a small, light metallic blue hybrid car - too low to see over my high tailgate and just about the right hue in the slightly dimming daylight to blend into the grayish dry, pavement. I had just backed into it and there was a man looking to be in his mid forties, slowly climbing out. I knew the next few minutes were about to be interesting and hoped in my heart it went well.

How did he get there? I honestly don't know. He'd obviously approached from my right. I'd looked both ways and my backup sensors never went off.  I caught him right at the front corner of his passenger side fender with my rear bumper. I could  assume that he was darting hurriedly in an effort to get home and was going far too fast in the parking lot, which is what I suspect. I could have made all kinds of assumptions about how and why he ended up there without my seeing him. I could have chosen to be angry and self righteous - He could have chosen to be angry with his own justifications. I was tired, frustrated and short on time. It had already been a very long and trying day. The other driver looked as though he could be the surly type and I've been known in the past as one to solidly stand his ground in less than even odds. I was in control of my own vehicle and he of his, and sometimes in life, things happen abruptly,... but now... how to react?

Colossians 3:12-15 (NLT)
12 "Since God chose you to be the holy people he loves, you must clothe yourselves with tenderhearted mercy, kindness, humility, gentleness, and patience. 13 Make allowance for each other’s faults, and forgive anyone who offends you. Remember, the Lord forgave you, so you must forgive others. 14 Above all, clothe yourselves with love, which binds us all together in perfect harmony. 15 And let the peace that comes from Christ rule in your hearts. For as members of one body you are called to live in peace. And always be thankful."

Being a follower of Christ isn't a part time job. It's a life that we choose to live in submission to Christ, convenient or not, flesh gratifying or not. It's not a religion we follow out of an obligation to a religious order, but a life we choose to consciously live moment by moment and through event to event in relationship with Christ's heart and spirit. A life we choose to devote to Christ. This was exactly a moment that I could allow Christ in me speak, or one when my flesh could corrupt the opportunity and turn it into something ugly. The choice in that moment... and the responsibility for it - all mine.

It's not easy sometimes when flesh would struggle, attempting to rise up - wanting to overrule what Christ in us would choose on the spur of the moment. But as we allow the work of the Holy Spirit to transform us through the process of sanctification, it becomes easier and easier and more our habitual instinct. This work in myself is something that the Lord has brought pointedly to the forefront of my attention in own walk with Him - showing me my own need for it to overtake me further. He'd allowed moments to test me, to show me the fruit of His work in me, so I won't become discouraged. This was one of those testing moments and a moment of decision. How would I react? Who got out of the truck? Was it Christ in me or my own self righteous anger at what I suspected was his irresponsible speed? When I opened my mouth... at that very moment,... who would speak? I had a choice.

Thankfully and so gratefully, no one was hurt and the damage not too severe. And despite anything that could have occurred, there was no anger. In fact, I felt compassion for him. In a hurry, he had taken his wife's car instead of his own to run to the home improvement store for a quick trip. He didn't even take the time to grab his phone. He would now have to surprise her with her crumpled car on his return. As a husband, it's something I'd rather not choose...

Whatever the circumstances, whatever the event of the moment, as a follower of Christ there's a choice to make in how I respond. Jesus can and will do a lot of work in me and the credit for that work and it's fruit is His, but at any given moment the choice in how I respond to anything and the responsibility for that choice... is mine.

Lord,
Grant me ears that hear even the faintest whisper of your Holy Spirit in the most trying of moments, to secure my response in complete faithfulness to your heart and will...



Micah 6:8 (NLT) "No, O people, the LORD has told you what is good, and this is what he requires of you: to do what is right, to love mercy, and to walk humbly with your God."